It's (not) funny because it's true

Like I'm sure many kids did growing up, I spent a lot of time focusing on how awful my parents were. My Dad was always telling me what to do. He was very competitive. My mom was controlling. It all seems very silly now looking back, but at the time of course it was life and death.

So when I have those moments where I realize that I'm like my Dad, I am amused...sometimes. My Dad was my coach in Little League. The best play I made in the field was when I was on first base. I kicked a slow roller to second. The second baseman tagged the runner and threw back to me for a double play. My defensive prowess wasn't enough however and we lost the game. Afterward, as was our tradition, we went to the local ice cream place.

As we walked in, I was laughing about the play with an assistant coach. My Dad looked over with a scowl "What are you laughing about - we lost the game!" Several years later, I was playing cards with my future wife. We were playing rummy of some kind or other. She beat me. I made an off handed comment, "If I would have played that, I might have won."

"But....I beat you."
"Yes, I realize that, but if..."
"Yeah, but you LOST."
At that point I threw the cards across the room. DearWife might tell you that I threw them at her, but that is a malicious lie. Regardless, I was obviously keeper material.


There is a little story FIL tells from time to time about MIL. For whatever reason, he is the gatherer. And MIL has specific tastes. When she was sick one time, she sent him out for whatever medicine. He came back with the right medicine, but in the generic packaging. She was NOT happy. He was forced to go back out and get the right medicine. When he came back, he compared the labels. Everything was exactly the same except for the ink they used to write on the pills themselves.

On New Years eve, we had a few neighbors over - it was on the borderline of get-together and party. A certain someone was too busy to get to the store, so I was given the holy task of gathering the food.

She went over the whole list. Well, it's not a list so much as a spreadsheet divided into areas of the store (produce, dairy, dry goods, paper, BEER). One of the items she wrote down was a specific kind of cookie. "I'm not sure what it's called, but it's flat, and has a chocolate kiss in the middle, except it's flat. It's like the peanut butter cookies I made, but it's not peanut butter."

How hard can that be? So I went and got Sandies Fudge Drops. Exactly - to the word -what she wanted. I crossed that off the list and went about my business.

You can imagine the shock and horror on her face when I brought these back. "I can't put these out. You don't put these out. I wanted something completely different. That's why I put it in the produce section of the list."

So I went back and found the cookies she really wanted. Oddly enough, both cookies were put out on New Years eve. To be fair, I ate too many of both.


So tonight, LittleBrother was eating his leftover macaroni and cheese. The organic whole wheat variety (of course). When he was done he asked for more. "Sorry, we finished it." He demanded to see the bowl, which was empty. Then he insisted there was more. He got out of his seat. "What is he doing?" I naively asked.

He got down, walked to the cupboard and pulled out the box. Smiling, he said "make more please."

And he got exactly what he wanted (unlike DW and MIL).

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