8.18.2005

Haze of Summer

I had my first doctor's appt on Monday relating to the kidney donation thing. (For those of you just joining us, I'm being evaluated to see if I'm a match to give a kidney to my Dad). It took longer to get into the room than it did getting out.

The worst part was ripping off the 10 leads from the EKG. Other than that, they sucked about 7 vials of blood out, they're evaluating the jug-0-piss I have them, and I have a Chest X-Ray to do still.

The Doc wanted to chat me up about all the psychological aspects of the donation. "You know, it's possible that your dad's body will reject it. That's one of the under-apprectiated aspects of kidney donation." We talked about the whole process for a while. It was not enlightening really, as I've been over this ground internally many times. But at least he cared.

I don't really understand the concept of being upset if my dad's body rejects it. I'm making the decision based on all the knowledge I have at hand. It's the decision that matters, not the results. I have this habit of making endless analagies to poker. Greg Raymer (winner of the 2004 World Series of Poker main event) once told someone not to worry about results in poker tournaments. He said you need to be ok with the decisions you make.

And although I'm convinced about what I want to do, I can't actually make that choice until the time comes to go into surgery. I'm confident that I'll make the right decision. And if something happens after that, I'll still have made the right decision.

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