A co-worker walks up. "Um, is that black Accord yours? The brand new one?"
Why, yes, the stunningly efficient yet sleek Accord is mine, why do you ask?
"Because someone keyed it all to hell."
"If you're messing with me I am going to kill you."
Turns out someone had a field day in the parking lot. Another co-worker's car had a window busted out and his GPS stolen. Another guy from the building had a scrape on one side of his car. I had key marks on all panels.
I have no idea why someone would do this. It seems rather spiteful, and to my knowledge I haven't pissed anyone in the neighborhood off. So it's been a bad couple weeks to be a car in my employ.